But I want to encourage you to be around them in a place where you feel better and better about your ability to manage the demands of relating to these people.
For instance, if you can be in a group of people who are more than willing to carry the heavy burden of a conversation but at the same time allow room for you to talk when you feel the need, then that will provide you the opportunity to work progressively on your shyness in the interpersonal sphere. Well, there are book clubs that sometimes provide this kind of opportunity.
For this particular problem, I recommend that you not be in therapy for longer than five or ten sessions.
I just want you to see someone long enough for you to investigate the roots of your shyness.
This ‘hope is a strategy’ mentality is not going to get you very far.
If you are looking for a job, do you just sit around waiting for companies to realize that you would be a great employee?
Or do you go out there and contact employers, telling them about what an asset you would be to their company?
Deal with your shyness by doing what you need to do about feeling good about yourself.Some people are shy because they feel inadequate within themselves.When I ask them, “What do you feel inadequate about? I’m just overweight.” I say to them, “Look, if we’re going to deal with your shyness, we need to deal with your weight problem.It won’t matter who it is, you’ll get some laughs from it. As you practice doing these things, you feel more and surer of yourself.As the shyness begins to subside you will no longer feel quite the same intensity of anxiety.